Are you a good person?

Are you a good person?
Published: 2013 August 07 16:35:35 (3447 Views)
The question is simple enough but how many of us can say what makes someone a good person?

Dr Rick Hanson, a neuropsychologist and author, says that being a good person is more about having a positive mental attitude.

He defines being a good person as 'seeking the happiness and welfare of oneself and others'.

To him, people are good when their core needs are met.

Ultimately, being a good person is not about over-giving.

It is not about putting others first at every opportunity and sacrificing as much as possible to become a good martyr figure.

In everyday life, being a good person is about serving yourself just as much as others.

Here is a test to see how much of a good person you really are. Make note of the letter you choose, and view your results at the bottom.

1) You are recently made redundant and your closest friend at work is given a promotion, do you:

a. Acknowledge the niggling feelings of envy but still wish them congratulations.

b. Go and speak to your boss about your friend's excessive Facebook habits at work.

c. Cry in the toilets.

d. Ignore how you feel and throw your friend a celebratory party.

2) You see an old woman drop a £50 note as she gets on to the tube, do you:

a. Compromise and buy a round for your friends at the pub.

b. Try to ask around if anyone knows her and then eventually just keep it.

c. Call TfL to see if she has reported it lost, Tweet about it in case she gets in contact and then finally donate it to an old people's home.

d. Spend it because you know you'll never find her.

3) Your partner's grandfather passes away while you're on a very important business trip. Do you:

a. Speak to them over Skype and explain you'll try and get back as soon as you can.

b. Remember what it was like when your grandfather died and tell your boss you're too upset to work.

c. Tell them you're busy preparing for work and will speak to them when you're back in a week.

d. Get the first flight home without asking your boss and organise the entire funeral.

4) The intern at your office has come over to ask for your advice on getting ahead in your industry while you're in the middle of something important. Do you:

a. Tell them the first step to getting ahead is not bothering busy people.

b. Carry on with your work and pretend you haven't heard them.

c. Put off your work and go and take them out for lunch.

d. Politely explain you're very busy but say you can talk to them later.

5) You have plans to go to a free Bruce Springsteen concert you've been looking forward to for weeks but a recently divorced friend asks if he can spend the evening with you instead. Do you:

a. Put off the decision until the last minute and then tell him you're suddenly not feeling well.

b. Cancel your plans and spend the evening with him. He is going through a hard time.

c. Say sorry but you have plans and you can see him another time.

d. Tell him you're busy and he should just get an online dating account.

6) You have prepared a dinner party but everyone cancels on you last-minute. Do you:

a. Tell them everything is fine and you had barely started preparing.

b. Ask them if you can tag along to their plans.

c. Tell them how disappointed you are.

d. Turn your phone off and vow to never meet up with them again.

7) After a hard day, you get a phone call from your grandmother asking if you can help her use her new iPad. Do you:

a. Explain you're tired and tell her you will help her another day.

b. Refuse outright. Can't she just read the instructions?

c. Take her through your day, explaining why it was so difficult.

d. Go over and put off your quiet evening for another night.

8) You see a small child lost in a supermarket. Do you:

a. Go over to them to try and ask them if they are OK.

b. Feel too embarrassed to go over. Someone else probably will.

c. Assume the child is lost and take them over to the desk with the tannoy system to track down their guardian.

d. Carry on shopping. Children aren't supposed to talk to strangers anyway.

9) Your friend asks you to sponsor her for a charity marathon but your rent is due and your paycheck is late. Do you:

a. Tell her you'll do it later and hope she forgets.

b. Give her as much as you can and explain you haven't been paid yet.

c. Tell her you don't believe in giving to charity because hardly any of the money makes it to the cause.

d. Give her as much as everyone else has even though you can't really afford to.

10) You haven't called your parents in weeks and you get a guilt-inducing voicemail from your mother. You have immediate dinner plans. Do you:

a. Postpone dinner so you can call them for a long chat. You have been emailing daily anyway but it's time you had a phone conversation.

b. Feel ransacked with guilt. How can you be such a selfish child?

c. Call them briefly en route to dinner just to apologise and let them know you'll call when you can.

d. Go to dinner. You can speak to them another time. It's good for them to live their own lives without you calling all the time.

Add up your score

1) a= 4, b=3, c=2, d=1

2) a=2, b=4, c=3, d=1

3) a=4, b=2, c=1, d=3

4) a=1, b=2, c=3, d=4

5) a=2, b=3, c=4, d=1

6) a=3, b=2, c=1, d=4

7) a=4, b=1, c=2, d=3

8) a=4, b=3, c=2, d=1

9) a=2, b=4, c=1, d=3

10) a=3, b=2, c=4, d=1

Results

30 – 40 - Well done, you are a good person. You accept that you are human and can't be perfect but you do try and think of others and help where you can. Balance is very important and you have it spot on.

20-30 - You are trying too hard to be a stereotypically good person. If you keep on over-giving you'll end up feeling bitter and used. Take some time to think about you and make sure you don't neglect yourself. You don't always have to put others first.

10-20 - You're letting your feelings get in the way and are unable to see past anything but you. It's important to take time for yourself but you're not helping anyone by being so emotional. Try and communicate more and be honest with others and with yourself.

1-10 - You're definitely focusing on you but are completely neglecting everyone else. Try to maintain a balance by thinking about other people as well. Being completely selfish is not conducive to being a good person.

- Telegraph
Tags: personality,
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